Physical abuse in homosexual relationships exists.

By Lungisa Somtombo.

Physical abuse perpetrated by men has blinded society into thinking that it can never be done by a woman in a homosexual relationship. A number of lesbian women are abused by their partners daily, these cases go unreported because victims are scared of coming out.

Sharing her story, physical abuse victim who wanted to remain anonymous said when she first started being abused, she did not have any argument with her partner, the partner just grabbed her and started beating her.

“She was swearing at me, slapping and punching me. All I could ask was what did I do. After the beating she begged me not to tell anyone” she said.

Anonymous further said the abuse got to a point where it changed her, she was becoming violent, and she got hostile and became angrier.

When asked whether she tried to open a case against her, she said she was afraid of what society would say and she did not want her partner to have a criminal record.

According to anonymous, lesbians abuse their partners for the same reasons men abuse women, to dictate, to control and jealousy.

Anonymous said homosexuals need to be more vocal about the matter and to also report these cases. The police must also treat these cases in the same manner as other cases of physical abuse. Similarly, communities should give support to homosexual people for them to be more open about these issues.

Speaking about the signs one should look out for at the beginning of a relationship, Psychologist Lisanda Ngxingo said people should check for personality, reaction, and their circle of friends.

“All these can be identified through communication hence it is important to discuss different subjects such as abuse, rape, etc. and check how a person reacts. Lastly, listen to how they speak about their friends because sometimes friends are a reflection of who a person is,” said Ngxingo.

Giving advice on those who find themselves in such situations, Ngxingo said they must leave the relationship. She added that they can get a protection order or open a case but most importantly, they should leave because people are dying at the hands of people who claim to love them.

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